Parade Raining: Mr. Ryan Ludwick

Quick - name the NL MVP so far this season...

Utley? Berkman? Chipper? Hanley? Pujols?

Nope. It's Ryan Ludwick.

So in a year where Chase Utley, Lance Berkman, and Chipper Jones are putting up monstrous numbers in the National League, for your consideration I give you…

Ryan Ludwick.

Ludwick should get some serious consideration for his league’s top honor at the end of the year.

A few things to consider:
It's June 13.
There are ~90 games left for teams.
A certain best hitter in the game with a .475 OBP bats near or around Ludwick.
It's June. 13. 90+ games to play.

I'm not saying don't do these "This dude is having an MVP-type season on May 1!" (although it's advisable not to) but can't we wait until post-All-Star break, at the very least?

On June 11th, the day the Cardinals placed all-universe slugger Albert Pujols on the DL with a calf injury; Ludwick hit his team leading 16th home run, good for 6th in the National League.

I smell a "he rose to the occasion, put his team on his muscular back and willed them to victory" moment here.

Now that Pujols is out of the lineup, besides Ludwick, who do pitchers fear, at all, in that batting order? I would venture a bet that he cools off very soon.

His other numbers through June 11th were just as spicy.

Mmmm!!

Ludwick was 6th in the National League in batting with a .321 average, 2nd in Slugging with a lofty .684 and his On-Base Percentage was a robust .393.

Ludwick's non-spicy, non-MVP teammate's numbers: .347 AVG/.631 SLG/.475 OBP. Oh, and the order is AVG/OBP/SLG - it just makes it hard when you do them out of order.

His 52 runs batted in are good for 4th place.

Pujols' 42=shit.

His 37 extra-base hits are good for 6th place.

Pujols' 31=garbage.

And for all you Sabermetric

Adding

types out there, his 1.055 OPS is good for 4th place. And he currently has 51 Runs Created, good for 10th in the NL.

Pujols' 1.105 OPS=third. His 69 RC=fourth.

When you consider that this is Ludwick’s first season as a full time player, the numbers become even more impressive.

This is a typo. He meant to type "less" instead of more.

Flukes happen in baseball. A lot, actually. Ever heard of Brady Anderson? And a million other players who hit a lot of homers and then did nothing?

Pujols (and Utley/Berkman/Chipper) have been good for long periods of time, making their numbers much more legit. Would anyone be surprised if Ludwick hit zero homers the rest of the season? Not me.

Add to those numbers this interesting fact: Ludwick is on pace to ground into only 6 double plays for the entire 2008 season. Throw in his solid if not spectacular play in right field and you have not only an All Star in the making but most definitely a legitimate MVP candidate.

New MVP criterion: not GIDP and playing averge-to-below-average defense!

Also, missing comas.

The numbers that Ludwick is putting up are very similar to the numbers his perennial MVP candidate teammate Albert Pujols puts up year in and year out.

Including this year (pre-injury) that are/were greater than or equal to Ludwick's.

And Pujols, from 2001 to 2006, finished no lower than 4th in the NL MVP voting.

Conclusion: Ludwick=Pujols.

Now, I realize that Utley, Berkman and Chipper will all most likely, if they don’t get hurt and continue on their current paces, have as good if not better season than Ludwick. But they were all supposed to have great seasons.

Jerks. Consistently good at baseball assfaces.

Ludwick’s year is like that little film I described earlier. It catches everyone off guard. This may be to his advantage come voting time.

I doubt it.

MVP voter #1: So about this Ludwick kid.
MVP voter#2: Who? Someone I've never heard of/talked to daily/wrote a puff piece about? Must. Not. Vote.

/Hanley Ramirez rant.

The next three to six weeks will really tell the tale. Pujols will be gone for at least 15 games, and maybe twice that. ... But if the Cardinals keep pace, or better still, catch and pass the Cubs in that time span, and Ludwick leads the charge on the field and in the batter’s box, he will have to be taken more than seriously.

He may be the front runner.

Other damning Ludwick stats:

.361 BABIP leading to inflated BA
24 BB/51 K rate
A career .268 average over 800 ABs
However stupid, the Cards not being in first
Pujols being hurt
Cardinals lineup being bad
It being June.

Meeting between guys who choose the NBA Finals soundtrack

Guy #1: Thank God the Celtics made the finals.
Guy #2: Why? The storied rivalry? The two best records in the league playing each other?
Guy #1: No, dumbass. It makes our job easier. *Pulls out milk crate full of dusty vinyl*
Guy #2: What is that?
Guy #1: They're my old records - from high school.
Guy #2: ...
Guy #1: Ever heard this gem? *takes out Boston's Boston*
Guy #2: Umm yeah, I think so. It's Journey, right?
Guy #1: Nope. Motherfucking Boston. That's where the Celtics are from!
Guy #2: Yeah, I get it. Didn't that album come out like, 30 years ago?
Guy #1: So what!? The classics never die.
Guy #2: Can't we use something more...contemporary?
Guy #1: See, this is why I am supervisor. NBA fans are all old and white. They wouldn't know Kanye West from Adam West.
Guy #2: *Looks at Boston* There are maybe three songs on this I've heard.
Guy #1: So? The band's fucking called Boston. It's a goldmine! People will love our cleverness! Besides, we can just shuffle those three songs, no one will notice or care. *Singing* We were just another band out of Bostooooon, on the road tryin to make ends meeeet...
Guy #2: How about like the Pixies? They're from Boston.
Guy #1: The whosies? What kind of gay shit is that?
Guy #2: Or maybe Dinosaur Jr.? The Cars? Even Aerosmith? They're all from Boston.
Guy #1: *Singing, playing air guitar* More than a feeeeeeeeeling, when I hear that old song plaayyyy. It's more than a feellleeeing.

Wojo forgets what he's writing about mid-article

So Gene Wojochoiwewoasksie at ESPN wrote an article about how Chicago is the new CRAZY-town. The points about Ozzie Guillen, Carlos Zambrano and Cedric Benson are all fine. Even though almost every other major sports city has similar characters, but whatever.

But things quickly degrade into what can only be called madness. Or pointlessness.

• And, oh, the Cubs have the best record in baseball.

This is crazy...how?

• The No. 2 pick in the 2008 WNBA draft, Sylvia Fowles, lasted exactly five Chicago Sky games before she injured her knee.

A WNBA reference?!?!?! I take it all back, Chicago is cwazy! In other news, the Chicago MLS team, the Fire, scored a goal during a game.

• Chicago was named one of four finalists for the 2016 Summer Olympics.

Cool, sure. Crazy? No. It's also eight years away, when probably half the other crap in this article will be passe.

• A former high school hoops player who has a home in Chicago won a big race. Maybe you've heard of him: Barack Obama.

Not sports related or crazy? Sign me up!

Amount of times "tough" and "hustle" appear in this article: 32562495

A certain Los Angeles basketball team is facing a certain Boston basketball team in contention for a giant gold basketball trophy thing. It's kind of a big deal.

Boston is up 2-0 in the best of seven series. What's the reason? Paul Pierce playing crazy-good? Shots not dropping for Kobe? Odom and Gasol not showing up? Home court? Rondo killing Fisher? Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. All that is much too obvious and written about. How about...

Hustle. Defense. Intensity. Intangibles. Grit. Guts. Gutty grits. Gritty guts.

Lakers need to blame defense, not refs

They should probably blame the refs, at least a little. 38-10 free-throw differential is insane. And it was like 38-2 until the fourth quarter.

So let me let me identify another cause: defense.

Sound argument. I can't wait for the stats Mr. Kriegal will use to back this up! (spoiler alert: they never come)

And yet another: hustle.

Ugh.

The reason for Boston winning is because they simply tried harder than those fairies in LA. Not a ridiculous FT diff. or better rebounding or Kobe notching as many points as shots taken or KG being unguardable.

To this point, Boston has been vastly superior in the coachable, if under-measured facets of the game.

They're not under-measured, they're immeasurable. But I suppose that's why you have a job - telling me, part of the unwashed masses, that a team is winning by some mysterious way that only you, the sportswriter can see.

I'm not pronouncing the Lakers dead, not yet. I covered the '93 Knicks, who jumped out to a 2-0 lead on the Bulls with John Starks dunking over Michael Jordan. You know how that one turned out.

No, I don't know how "that one turned out." It was 15 years ago. I assume Jordan won.

But the Celtics — and I didn't think too much of them going into the Finals — have played as if they want it more.

Things sportswriters can intuit that mortals can't: who "wants it more."

Take Ray Allen, the weak link in Boston's so-called Big Three. A few weeks ago, it seemed as though his star status was about to be permanently revoked ... But he never took a possession off on defense.

Never. Not once. In "possessions taken 'on' on defense," Allen is a perfect 120-for-120.

He's also allowed Kobe to score 30 and 24 points. Did Kobe take a lot of shots? Yes. But Allen hasn't suddenly morphed into Bruce Bowen.

The league's Most Valuable Player went 9-for-26 in Game 1 and 11-for-23 in Game 2.

9-for-26 is pretty bad, but 11-23 is like 50 percent, which is not.

Fact: the Lakers are getting out-toughed and out-hustled by Ray Allen. The tough team that beat the Spurs in five games has gone soft.

The Ray Allen Hustlers: 2
The Kobe Braynt Loafers: 0

I'm not saying Jayson Stark is wrong, just not right

Jayson Stark. Smart dude, good writer. 

Over at his most recent installment of "That's Debatable," wherein he debates things that "are debatable," he talks about Griffey Jr. and Manny Ramirez, who are at or near milestones of 600 and 500 home runs, respectively.

It's close as to whose better, so props to Stark for taking a stand. But slops to his logic. 

Griffey suffered a million injuries and could have somewhere between 800 and 900 homers, which is insane. I also have basic researching skills and can look things up, so I know Manny has played less than Griffey. Let's see where this goes.

You can certainly argue Ramirez was a more complete hitter than Griffey (.312 average to Griffey's .289, .408 on-base percentage to Griffey's .373, .591 slugging percentage to Griffey's .550). And it's impossible to dispute that Manny has had the steadier career

All very convincing. Let me add some more, seeing as I know the outcome of the article (spoiler alert: it's not Manny).

Seasons: Griffey - 20 Manny - 16

OPS+: Griffey - 139 Manny - 154

Silver Slugger awards: Grif - 7 Man Ram - 9

All Star games: G - 13 M - 11

MVP finishes: Griffey - 19, 9, 17, 5, 2, 4, 1, 4, 10 Manny - 12, 6, 3, 6, 9, 9, 6, 3, 4, 18

All very close. Except seasons. And OPS+. 

Manny still has a few more seasons in him, and could, mayyyyybe, get to 600. For some reason this four season gap is never mentioned. 

Well, let's start with some basic mathematics. Last time I checked, 600 was a lot bigger number than 500. 

One hundred bigger, actually. Which is a whopping 2.5 of Manny's 162 game average of 41 homers. Did I mention Manny is four seasons behind Griffey?

And 20 is bigger than 16. 

Manny was the 24th name in the ever-swelling 500-Homer Club. 

I assume this is steroids-era dig. Why oh why are players who achieve certain landmarks (which are arbitrary, by the way) later than those before them, penalized? In 50 years, when Albert Pujols III joins the other 40 members of the 500 home run club, is it any less important than say, Jimmie Foxx? 

There are going to be more and more awesome players of the game of baseball as the years go on. More and more are going to hit 500 home runs. It's just the way things work. Players aren't going to suddenly stop hitting home runs for long periods of time. 

Griffey will be joining only Barry Bonds, Hank Aaron, Babe Ruth, Willie Mays and Sammy Sosa in the 600-Homer Club. Big difference.

Big diff. 40% of those guys probably used steroids. As opposed to 41%* in the 500 home run club. 

Yes, joining a group of five is cooler than a group of 24. But Manny could join that group when he's done. For the one hundredth time: Griffey has played longer. Manny, less so.

But of course, Griffey also has a few other attributes. Like 10 consecutive Gold Gloves, a unanimous MVP award, three Players Choice awards, a spot on the All-Century Team and another spot on the all-time Rawlings Gold Glove team. Among other things.

Griffey was absolutely a better defender. But Gold Gloves are silly, they're given to whoever won it the previous year and I doubt the committee (if one exists) uses any metrics beyond "fielding %" and "plays that made me scream 'WEB GEM!'"

Unanimous MVP is pretty rad, a spot on the all-century team is essentially meaningless, as it had no criteria and I have no idea what the hell a players choice award is. If it's anything like the Nickelodeon Kid's Choice Awards, then it's awesome.

And "among other things" is straight-up lazy.

With all apologies to the Manny Being Manny Fan Club, I deduct points for all those jogs to first base, week-long midseason vacations and inability to fit spring training into our man Manny's busy schedule.

Ugh. Double ugh. Triple ugh. These have nothing to do with Manny's ability to play baseball. 

I deduct points from Griffey for being on the Mariners, having a kickass baseball video game and playing with his dad.

Plus, I guess I missed the news about those 10 Gold Glove trophies Manny secretly won.

Ohhhhhhh snap. Epic burn. 

After he picks Griffey, Stark opens it up for comments. Some of which are not completely moronic.

Dave (Colorado Springs): We always talk a lot in Major League Baseball about stats and comparing one to another to determine greatness, when in the end, the only thing that matters is winning. ... How many championship teams has Griffey been on again?

Jayson Stark: You know, you make a valid point. But I'm always hesitant to make judgments about any player based on how many rings he might wear. If we're going to use that standard, then I guess Luis Sojo was a greater player than Griffey. So I'm fine with factoring in championships, but I'm not so fine with using them as any firm barometer.

But how many gloves of gold they wear, I am totally down with.

*made up figure