Sunday, May 04, 2008

Baseball Stadium play list 2.0

When two of my loves converge into a Reese's peanut butter cup of awesome, I have to take the opportunity to write about it. A while back, I made a play list of songs that I deemed good for use during a baseball game. Well I am going to do it again. And yes, I am an uncreative jerk.

"Hey Muscles, I Love You" - Muscles
Usage: whenever

There was no way I was going to do this and not include Muscles. The electronic artist/party animal's music is perfect for a day of baseball. The song has great fan interaction possibilities - I am picturing Fenway and "Sweet Caroline" type shit.

It's simple, during the chorus stop the song right after the "Hey" and let the fans fill in a players name before cutting back to the song. For example: "Hey, *Jeter*, I love you, I wanna have your babies." If that isn't genius, I quit.

"The Magic Position" - Patrick Wolf
Usage: great defense (particularly a diving catch)

"It's you who puts me in the magic position." If that isn't the ultimate props to a coach's defensive placement for his center fielder, I don't know what is.

"Paper Planes" - M.I.A.
Usage: after a stolen base

The chorus is the meat of this choice - the cash register, "I fly like paper" line and family-friendly gun shots, make this the perfect soundtrack to a base theft.

"Crimewave" - HEALTH
Usage: literally anything, but great for late rally or closer theme

On the short list of songs for 2008 that allow me to run through a brick wall, this song - with it's tribal drums and dissonant guitar squeals - would send a stadium full of clones of me to the brink of frenzy. Just what the doctor ordered for a late-game comeback.

"Waving Flags" - British Sea Power
Usage: after a blowout win or closing in on a sweep

Although the song isn't about giving up like I want it to be, no one is going to know that. The "we're all waving flags now" is such an awesome kick in the pants to a downtrodden team, I couldn't pass up.

"Machine Gun" - Portishead
Usage: closer entrance music


It would have to be instrumental, but the 15 seconds or so on a loop would be scary as hell. Bonus points if your closer has goggles or facial hair - just seems fitting.

"Slaves Shall Serve" - Behemoth
Usage: closer theme

You know how closers come out to like Metallica and Ozzy and probably think it's badass? The opening 10 seconds of this song would make Jamie Moyer throw 100 mph, guaranteed.

"Set Fire to the Face on Fire" - The Blood Brothers
Usage: hot hitter to the plate, opposing batter strikes out on a fastball


Opening five seconds will do, thanks.

"Rich Girl" - Hall and Oates
Usage: harassing a high-paid free agent


There needs to be more songs aimed at harassing opposing players in sports. I am picturing Barry Zito hearing this every time he pitches on the road - probably at home too.

"Handle Me" - Robyn
Usage: pitcher striking someone out

Would juiced-up baseball players and fans appreciate the pop-y glory that is Robyn? No way. But the line "it's plain to see, you can't handle me" is undeniably perfect for a batter striking out on a curveball or some high heat.

"It's Tricky" - Run DMC (hilarious video)
Usage: any bunt or double steal, goofy error by opponent


Great song to punctuate any form of successful chicanery by your team - be it a double steal, suicide squeeze or hit and run. Also hilarious for an opposing outfielder dropping a pop fly or misplaying a ball.

"Bathory Erzsebet" - Sunn O)))
Usage: closer entrance


The 7+ minutes of a huge bell being rung (not in the Youtube vid) may have to be cut down a tiny bit, but once that first distorted riff kicks in (timed with the pitcher touching the rubber for the first time, of course), opposing batters will be soiling themselves.

"Intro (Never Back Down)" - Throwdown
Usage: trailing going into the ninth


Obscenity rules be fucking damned, this song is too adrenaline-pumping to not be played in a park. Especially like the "you fucking bastards!" part.

"March Of The Fire Ants" - Mastodon
Usage: clean-up or three hitter coming up to bat

Not much to say other than one great heavy opening.

"Bulls on Parade" - Rage Against the Machine
Usage: post-seventh inning rally


Great title and very good riff combine for a solid comeback song.


Thanks the hypem.com for directing me to all those wonderful music blogs with mp3s. As far as those mp3s go, just listen to them, don't download. If you like it, buy it and if any artist would like them taken down, I'd be happy to do so.

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